The Family Pool

Welcome to the shallow end of our family gene pool!

Good Bye Huggies

As of today Ella has gone 4 days without a "potty" accident. For the past four days she has been wearing big girl undies! I am so proud of her! I have dreamt of this time for the past year, yet today I had a small moment of sadness. I realized that this is the first time in 8 years that I haven't had to change a diaper or pull-up. There are currently NO Huggies products in our home. I know, I know I should be ecstatic! Oh, please don't get me wrong... I AM! Yet, it still seems sad to know that my babies aren't "babies" any more. For almost a decade my life has revolved around diaper changes, leaks and smells. Now, suddenly all that has come to an end. Thrilled? YES! I'm blessed with 3 beautiful, healthy, active kids. Eight years ago as I sat night, after sleepless night, on the verge of insanity, holding my screaming newborn I laughed at those who tried to tell me it would all pass so quickly. Now, 2 more babies later I see exactly what they mean. Oddly enough, the "quick" concept isn't something you can tell someone, it can only be learned by living through it. Now perhaps this same thought will help to sustain me though the quickly approaching teen years! Well, Thank You Huggies for 8 extremely adventurous years! It has been nice knowing you, perhaps 20 years from now we'll meet again for the next generation!

Action Figure

This post is for Reid, because ya know... if you read it on the computer it's true. So, here goes.... AN ACTION FIGURE IS NOT A DOLL! Well Reid I hope that helps solve your current dilemma. Regardless of what your goofy, girl cousins may say, I repeat, AN ACTION FIGURE IS NOT A DOLL!

Nuts

Hayden spent the day salivating over a can of mixed nuts. He spent the day passing by the can of nuts and taking small handfuls. By 3 o'clock I cut him off. No more nuts! Then, right before dinner he asked me if he could have some more nuts with his dinner. I said sure and he replied, "Good because I love me my nuts." I bit the inside of my cheek to keep for laughing as he walked through the house saying "I love me my nuts, I love me my nuts!" Who knew mixed nuts could be so entertaining!

Since When Does One Need To Pay For Public Information?

Here is the email I just received from our township zoning official. I emailed him asking for the minutes and dictation from last nights meeting. This is the response I was given. I have copied and pasted it directly from my inbox. So, much for the records of public meetings being public knowledge. I suppose if you want to buy information, you can. First I'd want to read the transcript. I want to make sure that it is KNOWN that the ONLY reason my children now have a truck stop 25 yards from their house, is because good ole Craig couldn't make up his mind and then, after thinking about it for 20 seconds said, "Oh, I guess I'm ok with it." Ball less fu#*er!--------------------------------------------------------------------




The only official document from last night's meeting that is produced is the "Findings of Fact and Conclusion of Law" and that will not be available until next month - You can officially request a copy of that if you want to and it will be sent when it is prepared and signed. please provide your name and mailing address

The transcript of the hearing is available directly from the court stenographer at a cost of $375.00

You can contact her directly - Her name is Cynthia Repman and can be contacted at 771-9289

This is the procedure is provided for in the Pennsylvania Municipalities Planning Code (Act 247 as amended)

There are no minutes prepared from the meeting nor are minutes approved by the zoning hearing board

Please contact the township office if you have any additional questions

Stewart S. Olewiler, III
Zoning & Planning Officer

Rutter's Farm Stores Part II

Well here is how Rutter's management left the store last evening. Instead of turning all the lights off when they left(yes, they still closed at midnight last night), they left the top of the store illuminated. I supposes they are trying to ease the "poor residents" into life with 24/7 spotlights in our living rooms. Am I mad? Na, I have a new strategy. I'm going to leave our curtains open, then walk around our house (after midnight) completely naked. Yep, I can see a decrease in Rutter's profits already!

Rutter's Farm Stores

Well despite Rutter's claims that they are a family oriented organization, they seem to care very little about this particular family. Despite 8 residents outcries the Manchester Township Zoning board ruled in favor of Rutter's. Effective immediately they are able to remain open 24 hours. I'm honestly crushed. Rutter's lawyer presented a very weak case and our zoning officials bought it! Their traffic studies showed a substantial increase in traffic in the past 11 years. These studies did not break down the traffic volumes by the hour, so there was no way to prove that there is extremely minimal traffic on our street between the hours of 12am and 6am. Sadly this didn't seem to matter to two of the three zoning officials. So, now my kids are forced to try to sleep while car doors slam, 18 wheelers pull in and out and people yell, cuss etc. across the street from us. Apparently sleeping with your windows open is a luxury my children aren't allowed. Therefore, if you happen to be reading this and would find yourself passing through York Co. please stop at a Sheetz. Rutter's has, for many years, hidden behind the facade of family, community and children. Tonight they showed 8 upset residents their true colors. It's just business, business, business and glory be to the almighty dollar. I pray they find out through decreased profits how little traffic exists here between the hours of 12am and 6am. Keeping all the lights on, paying 2-3 employees and for what?! I can't see it would even be worth it. It's sad really, our zoning officials have basically OKed a truck stop in the midst of a residential area. Terrific! According to Edgar Sentz and Craig Wisherd (the two dim bulbs on our zoning board) our complaints about trucks parking for prolonged periods of time will be better managed if the store is open for 24 hours. WHAT! No, more trucks will come and stay, there will no way to prove that they aren't supposed to be there! Wow! GREAT thinking Ed and Craig, um, LIU called their looking for two of their adult students and I think you just fit the description. Well, as you can see I posted pictures of "quiet Rutter's" and "no light leaves our property Rutter's". Notice how the light shines on the street and our front yard. For crying out loud I can weed our front flower beds at 11pm with only the light from Rutter's! If no light is leaving their property then where the hell is it all coming from? Oh, wait I forgot....my shining personality! (Ok, anyone who actually knows me, I apologize for any injuries you may have sustained while falling off your chair laughing at that last comment.) Don't forget..... visit your local Sheetz, at least they don't claim to be family loving, baby kissing, up standing members of society. So, visit Sheets and piss in a Rutter's parking lot!

My Most Recent Plight

Notice I said "Most recent". I started typing "My Plight". Then I heard my mother's voice saying, in her questioning/condescending tone, "You only have one?" Ok, ok.. so I ALWAYS seem to have a plight, but this one is a pending plight..... with Rutter's Farm Stores. A few weeks ago we received a Zoning Hearing Notice from our township office. Well tomorrow is the hearing and I have myself all worked up! You see our lovely local Rutter's has decided that they would like to change their hours from 6am-12am to 24hours. Why?! We live less than a mile from 3 24 hour Rutter's! Do they really need another 24 hour convenience store in a 1 block radius. Could someone please call the Rutter's family and explain "saturation" and "over-kill"! They, oddly enough, are a commercial property in the midst of a residential area. We purchased our house knowing Rutter's would close at midnight. Honestly, it's nice when they close. The neighborhood gets quiet, traffic becomes basically nonexistent, and things finally get dark. It's great! Now the Rutter's conglomerate is asking for a "Special Exception" that would allow them to shine their insanely bright lights through our windows 24/7/365. Yeah, that's right 365! Seriously people, take a flippin holiday! God forbid a possible one dollar profit is lost! Ahhh! Anyhow I really don't need the extra noise, increased truck traffic, and blinding lights glaring through the windows (think Kramer and the Kenny Rogers Roasters sign). Besides, who honestly visits these stores at 3 am? Ya know I'm gonna be awakened at an ungodly hour by "YO! ANTWAHN! DO YOU NEED SOME CIGS? WHAT! THE GREEN ONES? OH NO SHIT DOG THEM THINGS STINK I GET YOU DA BLUE PACK!
silence... then.. ANTWAHN! YOU GOT ANY MONEY FO ALL DIS?!" Before he even had a chance to respond I know my head will be hanging out the front window telling him to get off his ghetto ass and by his own damn "cigs". Oh! The stress of even thinking about it is driving me nuts! If you are reading this, please take a moment and pray about our meeting tonight. Oh, and if you think I'm being racist by my choice of names I'm not. Just insert any replacement for Antwahn, like Bo, Bubba, Rico.... ya know whatever! Choose any name that would fit the name of the person who would be unable to buy "cigs" for himself at 3am! Ugh! Welcome to my pending plight! Besides, WHO really goes to Rutter's? Anyone who is anyone KNOWS Rutter's tea sucks (Turkey Hill yum!) and Sheetz has cheaper gas and more convenient everything! If Rutter's is looking to increase their profit perhaps they should ditch the 24hour idea and try selling Turkey Hill tea and disguising their building as a Sheetz!

If You Are A Blood Realitive Of A Klahold (Or A Hunt) Stop Reading Here

Ok, obviously if you are reading this you are not a Klahold or a Hunt. If you are a Klahold or a Hunt, well you've been warned. I am currently so angry I could spit! Oh, wait I'm sure I've been spitting as I released my venom on my Mom, my Sister and James. You see, today I spent 7 hours digging through garbage, spiders, rat shit and poison. Why? Well my mother-in-law has finally decided to sell her property. In order to do this farm machinery (mainly severely rusted and in pieces) needs to be dug out of piles of weeds and poison. I mean honestly, we're not talking a few weeds, we're talking find a piece of metal peaking out of the woods and then start digging. I never thought I'd know the joy of uncovering machinery. For those who didn't marry into the less fortunate side of the Clampet's, let me explain. One walks through the woods until you bump into something that feels like metal. Then you take a large metal gardening rake and scrape it over the metal until you can identify the form. Then you have the joy of yelling "Ah, look I found a plow!" Seriously, Christmas has NOTHING on this! In fact I found a Lincoln Welder today! Now, growing up in a welding family I saw LOTS of welders. I must say none of them were as creative as this one! Not only was it completely covered with poison on the outside, it actually had poison growing up through the inside. The only clue I had as to what it might be was the tell-tale Lincoln logo peeking out through the mass of vines. So, after spending my day digging through a landfill. My husband informs me that his mother told him to "Tell his wife to be quiet." REALLY? Now, I wonder why James waited until we got home to tell me such a thing. Well, since I've been forbidden to call Vonny (my mother-in-law) I've decided to just post my reaction here..... (1) You have a problem..... tell ME. If I upset you, tell ME. I call it like I see it, I always have, if this bothers you call me on it! (2) What exactly did I say that upset you? Here is a list of possibilities..... (a) "The only thing that will clean this house is a bulldozer!" (No reason to get upset, this is TRUE... notice no one brought cleaning supplies today, only metal rakes and shovels. A bulldozer WILL BE the only thing cleaning the house.) (b) "How the hell does a house ever get like this!" (This is also a TRUE. How the hell does a house ever get like that! Oh, and please don't blame it on "the boys", YOU were the parent, they were the children! Grab a mop, grab a bucket and throw the greasy shit outside! Oh, oh, oh! And the yard! I can hear it now! "The boys would never....mow, weed etc." Well throw a freakin match out the front door. They would have started running as soon as the flames started flickin the barn!) (c) "You don't get to watch the races when you have THIS to deal with!" (Again.... TRUE! If you need $ and the only way to get $ is to sell property, scrap metal, books, machinery then your butt had better be helping with the process NOT parking in front of Nascar!) (d) "It didn't look like this when Walt died." (TRUE, and self explanatory! It DIDN'T look like that when Walt died! For example, one could see the kitchen floor! (e) "When you're gone, I'm roasting marshmallows over these books." (Yet again...TRUE! What does anyone need with THAT many books! There is easily thousands upon thousands of romance novels! Why? Read it and pass it along! There will be others. Just read it and pass it along.) (f) "What is she planning on doing, bubble wrapping the dishes with the rat shit on them?!" (Ok Vonny, seriously what are you planning on doing with those dishes? There is no running water in the house and you want to save dishes that are covered in rat shit! Some of the dishes even have food on them still! EEEWWW!) Aside from those comments I don't know what I could have said that would lead you to think I needed to be silenced. However, since I have the chance, let me just say..... half the crap you took to Dawn's house today (ex. boxes of unopened bills and statements from 2002-2003) is only going to clutter her home. I think it is a sick disgrace that you would want to clutter your child's home the way you have cluttered your own! Well, after immersing my self in poison and the black plague my "thank you " comes in the form of "Tell your wife to be quiet!" Therefore I'm done, good luck working on the rest. Now how exactly do you plan on accomplishing anything with your "too sore to actually do anything feet"? Yeah, good luck with all that, I'm sure as hell not going back down there and I think James may have other things to occupy his time. So, have fun digging out farm equipment, gathering up all the farm machinery and hauling all that crap out of that house. I (a.k.a we) are done!

Wendy

Hey Eveyone! Wendy, my sister (the skinny one), just started her own blog! Visit her at http://www.livinonashoestring.blogspot.com/ and don't forget to leave a comment and let her know what's up and what you think of her new adventure into the world of blogging! Good luck Wendy! I look forward to reading your blog for some comic relief from MY day! Oh, hopefully this picture will further help her realize that the boat picture did NOT show back fat! At least not as much as mine would have!

Children Of The Corn

On Tuesday the kids and I tie-dyed a whole bunch of shirts. As you can see the kids are showing off their creations, while at the same time showing off James' corn crop! Welcome to our urban farm!